Michelle Frey’s Work of Heart

Michelle Frey’s “Mercury Tears” interactive exhibit was on display at SJSU this spring. Photos courtesy of Michelle Frey.

It’s safe to say that the world changed dramatically throughout Michelle Frey’s six years pursuing a graduate degree at San José State. Frey, ’25 MFA Pictorial Art, who works by day as the senior director of creative strategy for university marketing and communications at SJSU, enrolled in her program in fall 2019, juggling full-time work with a part-time course load. A marketing veteran with a knack for artistic collaboration, she even squeezed in her first art show before campus closed in March 2020 due to the COVID-19 pandemic. And as classes and businesses were forced online, Frey relocated to Phoenix, Arizona, with her life partner of 13 years, Howard, to pursue medical treatment for his ongoing illness. 

Thus began a three-year period in which she shuttled back and forth between California and Arizona, balancing his care with her life in San José. When campus transitioned to a hybrid work environment in summer 2021, Frey took bi-weekly flights to accommodate the demands of her job and classes. Despite, or perhaps because of, the challenges posed by this constant back and forth, Frey saw art in everything.   

“I would look at water dripping outside my airplane window, and the drops looked like tears,” says Frey. “Those became watercolors. They became tears in an interactive exhibit.”

The sketches, photographs and notes that Frey outlined on her flights evolved into “Holding Pattern,” a show she created as part of her advancement to candidacy, an important step on the journey to completing her degree. The program emphasized traditional, digital and 3D art practices, encouraging students to explore various painting, drawing and printmaking techniques.

“Everything I was experiencing went directly into my work — I was expressing limbo, rising in the air, being in the clouds,then on the ground again,” she says. “Throughout all of this, Howard was supportive.”  

Exploring the abstract

Michelle Frey. Photo: Erin de Jauregui.

Frey’s artwork is wide-ranging and boundary-pushing. During her time at SJSU, she has experimented with various media, including  video, painting, encaustic, cyanotype, wood sculpture and metals like pewter and silver leafing. An interdisciplinary artist at heart, Frey’s work evolved in reaction to and alongside the progression of her partner’s illness.

“I started the program feverishly painting, getting a lot out of my system,” she says. “And then I took an advanced painting class that was focused on abstraction. Something shifted and I started seeing my art in a completely different way.”

Frey defines abstraction as an approach to artmaking that emphasizes the material or media itself, rather than an explicit message. Much like grief, abstract art for Frey is visceral and sensory, focusing more on the process of creation than the final product.

“Abstract art is more about the expression of your emotions through material,” she says. “In one project, I expressed how I felt about a hummingbird, but all you could see in the work was tiny thick feather-like shapes and movement. Abstraction became everything to me because of how it translates to life experience. Things don’t have to be a certain way [to feel real].”

The line between grief and art

Frey was in a figure painting class at San José State the night that Howard passed away in fall 2023. 

“That night, the model I was painting was a tall, thin male, just like Howard,” recalls Frey. “My paintings were reflecting the pain that he was going through. I look back at those paintings and I think, ‘I knew. My body knew.’”

Throughout their years together Howard, an artist in his own right, had urged her to pursue a master’s in fine arts degree. Whether or not he knew it, by encouraging her to study art, he ended up providing her with some of the necessary tools to navigate caregiving and grief. In the months following his passing, Frey immersed herself in poetry, as well as figurative and pictorial art, seeking ways to make sense of her new phase in life.

“Mercury Tears” by Michelle Frey.

Much like the advice in Emily Dickinson’s famous poem, “Tell all the truth but tell it slant—”, Frey’s art addresses big questions in original and sometimes indirect ways. A year after Howard died, Frey installed “Mercury Tears,” an exhibition in SJSU’s Gallery 5, that featured silverleafing, reflecting her process of mourning. She used silver metal leaf, a thin foil used historically to decorate and gild furniture and architecture, and provided tools so visitors could brush their own “tears,” leaving behind a residue that mirrored the lasting impact of grief. 

“Silver leafing is a decorative and superficial process that makes something look better or more expensive than it actually is,” Frey says. “So to me, it was similar to the feeling of having to rush through grief. We are kind of an anti-mourning culture in America. We’re told to suck things up and keep going, but there is this thin coating of feeling that stays with us. It’s always there. So [it was powerful to see] people experience that in the exhibit, watching the very thin flakes of leafing fall to the ground.”

Zoey Mubiru, ‘26 MFA Pictorial Art, was moved by the exhibit.

“I had a strong emotional reaction to Michelle’s ‘Mercury Tears,’” says Mubiru. “The moment I entered the space, I felt a shift. When she handed me a paintbrush, I walked over to one of the gallery walls and observed the delicate silverleaf that had been pressed onto its surface. I didn’t know exactly what to expect, but as I began to brush the wall, something magical happened — the silverleaf started to tear away, drifting softly to the floor like metallic petals. There was something hauntingly beautiful about it and that moment stayed with me long after I left the gallery.”

Artistic immersion

Though her work is laced with memory, Frey’s aesthetic has an eye for hope as well. She’s embraced every opportunity that the graduate program has offered, from participating in a collaborative art project in Costa Rica with Irene Carvajal, senior lecturer of pictorial art, to helping coordinate a unique exhibition at the Spartan Recreation and Aquatic Center with a Norwegian artist. 

This June, her work will be exhibited at the Institute of Contemporary Art in downtown San José, alongside several members of her grad cohort. She mentions the influence of many faculty members including SJSU Art Professor Robin Lasser, Pictorial Art Lecturer Irene Carvajal, Assistant Professor of Art Shaun O’Dell, Associate Professor of Digital Media Art Rhonda Holberton, as well as the work of her peers.

“I think I probably have had one of the best experiences as a grad student, because almost everyone finishes their degree within two to three years, whereas I’ve been here close to six,” she says. “I’ve seen the development of multiple artist cohorts. I’ve had the privilege of watching so many more students develop — truly empowering for me as an educator —and that has helped more than anything else could.”

Lasser has worked closely with Frey on a number of projects and counts her as a critical creative collaborator.

“Michelle’s work navigates the delicate balance between beauty and toxicity with grace and power,” says Lasser. “By inviting viewers to interact with her immersive installations, Michelle forges a communal meditation on loss and renewal. As a collaborator on large-scale projects, Michelle brings a sense of care and creativity, leaving an indelible mark as an artist, designer and friend. Truly, it is a complete honor and pleasure to work with Michelle. I look forward to collaborating with her for years to come.”

When asked how she’d describe her current work to her late partner, Frey is overcome.

“To be honest, I hope he’s actually watching,” she says. “I hope he can see it. I hope he’s proud.”